In 1962 in Atlanta, Martin Luther King Jr. delivered a sermon in which he described a form of love he called “utilitarian love.” The term referred to loving someone/ something as a means to an end, rather than as an end in itself. King gave examples of the ways we love people in utilitarian ways–we love them as long as they do for us what we wish them to do.
Centuries earlier Bernard of Clairvaux warned of the same kind of utilitarian love which surfaces in our relationship with God. He wrote that one of the most significant moves in the spiritual life is this:
- FROM loving God for self’s sake,
- TO loving God for God’s sake.
The problem with treating God like a tool box, something we pull out only when we need/ want him, is that he’s not always going to give/ be what we desire. It’s a devotion destined to lead to disappointment. More importantly, the approach treats God like an object rather than a personal being. God wishes to be in relationship with us in a way that allows us both to be who we fully are. It’s only when we come to love God for who he is, not simply for what he might do for us, that we come to enjoy the real essence of life with God.
